Saturday, July 18, 2009

Parish In Bray (23)

The transcript hereunder is of a series of recorded telephone calls which are pertinent to a particular case in this Parish but which were refused a has to only read the aforementioned transcript and understand why.

We here in CW have the calls on CD Rom and more than happy to issue copies to interested parties, something which was done some time ago as is.

Read and dare we say, enjoy...especially where the nun tells the priest she loves him!!!

You couldn't make it up!!

* * * * *

Fr. Larry White – Sister Peggy McArdle

This is Larry White down in Queen of Peace in Bray - em – Hi

Oh hi Larry

You weren’t answering your phone what are you doin?

Well you see I was in the car and I couldn’t get it

Oh that’s ok is everything all right?

How’s Larry I only want to ring and tell you I love you

Ah well that’s nice, that’s nice

That’s all

Ah well I was frustrated with this couple Jesus they are three sheets
to the wind

Tell me about it Larry – who are they?

Ah well this is the couple that I had doubts about and I sent them off to see yer man and yer man met them and said they are grand marry them I have huge question marks about it but I’m going ahead firstly Jesus they would drive you mad – he is a real s-l-o-w talker I don’t think he’s the full deck and she doesn’t want to walk up the aisle on the wedding day


Ha, ha, ha aw Jesus Christ and then eh eh can we have a photograph half way through the Ceremony? oh Jesus, can we give Communion to each other? I said I don’t give a shite what you do. Well l was an hour and a bit with them Peg and honest to God and I,

You didn’t need that today now, not today

I was saying to myself God grant me patience

Not today

Not any day, Jesus Christ Peggy, ah I mean does it matter? Feck,

Fuckin’ wish they’d just go

It doesn’t matter an iota

You are supposed to be on holidays

Well not that week Larry

Why not? We’re taking…….you were taking three weeks off in august, em, but anyway, hmm, hmm, anyway

Larry listen I love you and thanks

Last thing in the world you need is that, you need to be coming out to Lars tonight

I need to be going out to Lars tonight it’d be good

How’s Margaret?

Ah, sure Margaret’s grand, ah Jesus merciful hour, you better watch yourself, you better behave yourself, (laugh)

Is she over?

if you don’t behave, listen here if you don’t behave yourself I’m going to……..

Do you hear me, it would be much easier Larry for you

What would?

You wouldn’t have so many problems, I can do it, I don’t know what to do……

We have to get the money off for the holiday by the way

Oh God bless us yeah

Hi how are things?

Oh God if it had of been someone else I’d have been in trouble


If it had of been someone else

Then that would have been a problem all right

It would

It really would you know so -

Well do you know what I spent the last hour at? Sorting out application forms for Dispensations for people to get married and it’s a pain in the butt,


Desperate, desperate, desperate, desperate, desperate, desperate, I’m going to go for a swim at half one

That’s what I was just going to ask ya

I thought I’d tell you before you asked

Oh, that’s good, and are you taking the rest of the afternoon off?

(Yawn) yeah I’ve just (yawn) one or two (yawn) little small things to do, what?

Yes Larry,

What? What?

Will you take the rest off?

I will, I will, I will, I will, I will

Did you hear it

I heard ya, I heard ya, I heard ya, I heard ya, I will, I will, yeah, yeah

I’ll be checking up on ye

Yeah, yeah

So what are you doing for the rest of the day?

I, I, I, I’m going to do one or two little things and then I have to go into town because I have to buy, I have to do a few little things, does Larry need anything?


In town

(Yawn, yawn) no I can’t think (yawn) I can’t think, I can’t think of anything

Did you get that door fixed I’ll get your mat


I’ll get your mat, now you’re gone deaf

I am, I’m gone deaf in this left ear

Jesus Larry what am I going to do if you won’t be able to hear me?

I can’t hear you will you speak up


Ha, ha, ha, ha, obviously I can’t hear you, I can hear ya, will you say something

Hello Larry

That’s better, that’s better, that’s good, that’s great. So listen I better go I’ve to get these things sent off before I, before I em, before I can go for a swim.

All right Larry


I’ll talk to you Larry

Talk to you Peg, bye

Bye Larry

Bye Peg, Bye

Now you’re taking the rest of the day off

OK bye don’t be at me, don’t be at me, will you stop that

Did you hear me?

Will you stop that

Did you hear me?

Will you stop nagging me please

Did you hear me?

Will you stop nagging, bye, bye. bye, bye

Did you hear me?

I hear ya, I hear ya, bye, bye, bye, bye

God help you if you don’t, bye


* * * * *


Hi Larry

How are ya?

Ah how are you?

Oh Jesus, I’m getting, I, not, I'm still haven’t got out between

You’re what?

I still haven’t got out of the office yet

Ah Larry

Anyway I’m trying to get out now very shortly

Jesus get a break

I know, I know, but the….

You are on your holidays

A couple of ‘nut cases’ came in and you get stuck with them you know


A couple of people came in anyway, how are you, how are you?


No, no, no, no just people. How are you?

I’m ok, I got my thing changed to half one so I be over………..

Oh did you get it changed to 2 o’clock?

Yeah, yeah

Oh grand, grand that’s great, that’s good. So I’m trying to get out
of here and

get down town and get me stuff, get me bits and pieces you know

And get your thing packed

Yeah, yeah, so listen are you all right, how are ya?

You know I’m feeling much better

Are ya?

You know I am, I feel much…..Larry I’ll tell you about it when you come home

Well now do you know they were selling little, we were, this weekend we were selling little bands you know these things the plastic bands that the young people wear


And em, it says on them ‘Be not Afraid’ so I got you one, I’m going to give to it ya so you’ll have to put it on and wear it while I’m away and any time you’re feeling doubt just look at it and it says ‘Be not Afraid’ so now I’m going to get you to wear it when I’m away

Are you Larry?

Yes Peg I’m wearing one at the moment now and I’m going to get you one you know that, what?


Just as a little reminder

Ah, thanks Larry

There’s nobody compares to me than you, do you know, you know that Peg

I won’t delay you sure we will talk when I get you, I’ll ring when I’m near

Yeah ok

I’ll get out there and do the shop, right?

Yeah, I just rang to tell you that I’m thinking about you


Just rang to say I’m thinking about you?

I can’t hear you?

I can’t speak out loud

No, go on

But you know don’t you?

Yeah, Yeah, I know don’t say anything, bye, bye,

Bye, Bye.

* * * * *


Hi Larry

So how are things?

You couldn’t talk?

Ah no sure I mean, I had fellows out, no, no, can you talk are you driving?


Are you driving? Are you driving?

Ah yeah but I’m stopped because the traffic is terrible

Is it? OK. So how are you?

How are you Larry?

Well I went for a swim anyway. That was…………..

Good thank God there was a meeting?

I know, well I had these fellows coming out and they took an hour. Jesus merciful hour.

I’ll go inside now its alright.

How are things?

Were you talking to Des?

Grand, grand, grand.

Now you have the rest of the day is for……

I’m going to go for a swim now

Good, ah, good to hear ya

Good to hear you how was your morning?

Are you tired?

(Yawn) A little bit


But I’m not too bad, I’m taking the afternoon off that’s it I’ve just
finished now


I’ve just finished now with Margaret so I’ve done my bit.

You’re very lucky to have such a good Secretary Larry.


Well that’s what I mean

But I had to spend an hour this morning putting a chair together for her she wanted a new chair so I got her a new chair but it had to be assembled you know?

Jesus, Larry wouldn’t do that for Peg

Laugh ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, no this is an office chair, this is an office chair


Now, now, now, now, anyway so are you all right?

Yes Larry is that all right?

Yes but you take control of your own life


Right I mean if they had something important on……..

Larry takes great control of my life

Oh really?

* * * * *

Fr. Larry White and brother Tommy White (Italics)

Your Christian values are very, very em…….Larry .I’m annoyed, I don’t want to say more than I really…..I don’t want to say it……..out in the hall to her but she wasn’t having that apologies are no good to the Whites they have their fuckin pound of flesh that is what you’s want.

Well that is not the reason I rang Tommy because Tommy if you have, you have

David and Siobhan, listen hold on, hold on Jesus I’m an awful person will you please accept me back into your company is that why you rang?

No I didn’t, no I didn’t Tommy, Tommy I rang in the hope that as two brothers we could talk this over and try and find a way forward together but if you don’t want to that’s you know, that’s sad and you have Siobhan and David’s christening coming up which is a very important event em, and its not even just for that if there’s any chance, I mean ok there was force and you feel wronged there are other sides to it as well

You just want to remind of that

No hold on Tommy you have, you, you fairly laid it out in front of me so at least I wouldn’t bother, I’ve laid it out as I know it

Yeah, Yeah as you see it

I don’t know what you are talking about what is the other side I did lose my head and I did say some very unpleasant things I didn’t deserve to be beaten half to death for that and a cover up to follow

Well there was no cover up Tommy I think, I think if you think you were the only one who was a Victim there that night well then I was the victim

Tommy you were extremely insulting

Yes I accept that

And would you blame Pat for having a go……do you think that by saying sorry then it was all over

Get out of my house you have insulted my wife

Yeah he was right Tommy but Tommy you were very insulting to her

So this gives Eamon the right

No it doesn’t give Eamon the right at all

I’ll tell you one thing he wouldn’t have done it to the Tommy White that was around 6 years ago he wouldn’t have his life now he wouldn’t have done it to me

I’ve lost an awful lot a hell of a lot and a fucking thug like him thinks he can take advantage of me now he is a very very lucky young fellow not young fellow, old man, he is a very lucky fucking animal I can tell you that. Very, very lucky.

Why do you say that?

People were going to go down and do a job on him and I had to put my absolute maximum restraint on them and its not fine with them yet they saw the state of me of course not that you fucking bothered to find out not a phone call

Tommy I rang you the next day

Not as much as a phone call all week

Tommy that’s not true I rang you the next day

You did not

I did so

Did not

And I rang David the next day

You did not

You ask David, you ask David

He rang you

No that’s not true Tommy I rang David

I take my sons word before yours any day of the week Larry

OK well Tommy if that’s the way you wish to leave it em, that’s your choice

Right ok I must be saying something terribly different to what I’ve already said

Nothing has been said to me not as much as a fucking suggestion of an apology

For the torture I went through. Not as much as a suggestion. I don’t know if you have you ever had five broken ribs on top of six already previously broken and a broken collarbone and a fracture of the skull. I don’t know if you have ever been through that.

Well I mean if you had all of those injuries why are you not in hospital?

I will tell you why I am not in hospital I refused to go into hospital because I was told I’d be lying on a trolley for 3 nights before I would get a bed that’s why and that’s the only reason why and there is no hospital that will cure broken ribs. The reason they wanted me in hospital was under observation for the state of my skull and also the fear that my ribs would collapse and I wouldn’t be able to breathe so I can show you the apparatus that they gave me to take home so I had
to take every hour on the hour all night to help me to be sure I kept breathing. Do you want to
see that more proof?

No, I’m not.

More suspicions why weren’t you in hospital

Well I mean Tommy if you had a fractured skull you would be, you would have been in hospital.

I had a hairline fracture of the skull which is nothing they can do about either because that unfortunately is the first thing to heal itself. The second was the fear of the five fractures – I’ve got the report. I only going to see you to to show you the Hospital report. You don’t believe me.

Well Tommy did you also know that Eamon didn’t have any shoes on? Now did you know that?

Well he must have been very quick Eamon must have been very easily removed the Shoes

Tommy he had no shoes on

He had shoes on. I’ll tell you one thing he’s a terrific kick boxer that’s all I can say

He had no shoes on

So ok my ribs and my right hand side remember I fell down on my left, my ribs on my right hand side failed and broke themselves and so did my collarbone and so did I receive a hairline fracture to the skull that was all on the opposite side to what I fell on. Maybe I punched myself half to death. Did I?

No, I’m just telling you that Tommy.

You’re just telling me you don’t believe a word of what I’m saying that’s what you’re doing.

Look it doesn’t matter whether I believe it or not if you have that, and you have the evidence.

I will come around and show you what the fucking hospital says right? I will show it to you. I was going to write to you anyway just to tell you that I’m finished with you but I’ll do it face to face.

I don’t need to meet face to face if you saying that we are finished I only feel like meeting if we can find some resolution to this Tommy and you are the man that deals with resolutions and you know quite well that it does none of us any good to carry on a bitterness and a hatred.

Face to face if over some cup of coffee is going to put apologies from my mind what happened to me. Now we are told all of a sudden. Funny you never said that to Larry er, or to David when he spoke to you that Eamon wasn’t wearing any shoes, this delay, Claire never said it to me when I spoke to her either.

Well I mean how do you know what I spoke to David about?

David called me

David wouldn’t tell you everything Tommy

My son would tell me everything God yes, you seem to know everything about it

I don’t, I don’t Tommy, I don’t but I see no point in meeting if we are just going to start slagging at each other.

I said I’ll meet you if you want to meet me I’ll meet you and I reserve the right to say what I feel like saying at the time when I meet you. I certain would like to or if you are happy enough for me to post a copy of the Hospital report I will do that anyway.

No look I made the original offer and I was hoping that we could meet and at least not treat each other like as if we were total strangers. I mean if you want to continue it like that Tommy ok.

Well I suggest that we meet in about a month and you call me again right. Bye.

Is that all right with you?

All right maybe you might try and phone me this time.

No I won’t be phoning you Larry. I said yes I’ll meet you, right, I said yes I’ll meet you right now if that is not good enough for you I suggest you call me again in a month and maybe I won’t be feeling as sore and have the pain I have every day of the fucking and all night and having to take painkillers and all sorts of drugs and going around like a fucking with all the different painkillers stuff that I’m taking drugs to prevent the effects of drugs.

OK Tommy

If you want to meet me I’ll meet you


But I won’t give any guarantee what I’ll say to you.

No ok well

The only thing I can guarantee is that I won’t fucking beat you up the way he beat me up that’s one absolute guarantee.

Well Tommy, I mean, maybe, maybe you are right maybe let’s leave it for a

month because if, if, if you’re still angry and hurt and

You can call that one


You can call that one

OK I will, OK, bye

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