In a federal courtroom in Baltimore Nov. 5, 10 people stepped up to
give impact statements about the effects of their abuse as minors by
people connected to the Archdiocese of Baltimore. Their stories included
tears and frustration, as well as signs of hope and healing.
After each one completed their statement, a couple dozen supporters
in the gallery stood in silence with their arms crossed over their chest
in a sign of support and solidarity.
Judge Michele M. Harner allowed the witnesses as part of the
archdiocese’s Chapter 11 bankruptcy reorganization proceeding. This was
the third such set of impact statements provided in the case.
Baltimore Archbishop William E. Lori and Auxiliary Bishop Adam J.
Parker attended the session, as they have for the other two similar
hearings.
Before the session, a court officer ordered all those in the
courtroom to completely turn off their electronic devices. An order from
the court noted that although the session would be recorded as part of
the process, it would not be transcribed and would not be used as
evidence in the case.
Harner said, “As with the prior two (impact statement) sessions,
today is an opportunity for individuals to engage in the Chapter 11
process and be heard.”
As such, to allow as much time as possible for the witnesses, she
asked the parties in the case to forgo opening statements. The session,
scheduled for two hours, ran an extra 30 minutes.
The first victim-survivor to the stand noted that his parents had
sacrificed to send him and his three brothers to Archbishop Curley High
School. He detailed abuse by one of the teachers there, a Conventual
Franciscan, and noted that the priest is still alive. He said the fact
that he still is listed as a Franciscan is “an insult to me and to God
himself. I am a believer in God, but this is an insult.”
(While some of those who gave impact statements gave partial or full
names in their statements, the Catholic Review is not naming any of
them, to respect their privacy.)
The witness said the experience of abuse by the priest left him
“lost, confused and broken.” He said he shared his story in the case to
show how the effects linger long after the abuse.
A female victim-survivor who had been abused in the foster care
system and then by a nun at Villa Maria School said she spoke not only
for herself but for others who were in pain, hidden and dismissed. She
said she wanted to feel safe but instead was abused by those she was
supposed to trust.
She was abused again at another school. “My voice was silenced, and
my pain was ignored,” she told the court, noting that because of the
trauma, humiliation and neglect, by the time she left the foster system,
she had the equivalent of a third grade education. This led to a cycle
of low-end jobs, abusive relationships and feeling discarded like trash.
She noted that empathy, accountability and recognition of harm are
essential to providing healing. “The time to take responsibility is
now,” she said. “For decades, I have waited for this day – to be heard.”
Other witnesses echoed some of the same concerns – lack of trust, trouble with intimacy, addictions and strained relationships.
One witness explained that his mother was such a devout Catholic that
she would not have believed anything bad about priests or nuns. He
detailed the ways that priests groomed and then abused him, but he could
not tell his mother or others about the abuse. He doesn’t have friends
because he cannot communicate with people.
“Everything that happened to me is still inside me,” the
now-77-year-old said. As he broke down in emotions, he said, “My day is
coming when I am going to see God. Tonight, I can say, ‘God, I told the
truth.’”
A transgender woman took the stand to note how she had been abused,
which resulted in struggling to live as a male, unable to have a
relationship with women.
“The abuse took my health, education and dignity,” she said.
Diagnosed at one point with AIDS and expecting to die, she now notes
that through Narcotics Anonymous she has been seven years without drugs
and 15 years without a drink.
“I have been on a long journey to be here today” to be able to help
others. “I wonder what my life would have been like without the darkness
of these abuses,” she said.
She concluded her statement saying, “I will always be a survivor.”
At least two of the witnesses addressed Archbishop Lori specifically,
expressing anger and frustration at what they see as inadequate
response from the church and the bankruptcy process. One noted that many
adults in the church failed the girls who were victimized at parish
schools.
Another victim, who is representing himself in the case, noted that
he had been sexually abused by a gay choir director 20 years ago this
month. Like others, he detailed the impact of remaining silent about the
abuse, including never feeling safe.
Five years ago, a friend told him, “It’s OK to be you.” Those five
words – which no one had said to him before – set something free, he
said. Maybe he was not beyond repair or beyond hope.
He filed his claim in the bankruptcy case in 2024, including laying
out the timeline of abuse. Five months later, he attended a Mass of
healing for victims of abuse, where he went from tears of healing to
tears of gratitude.
He said survivors cannot find hope and healing if they remain hidden.
“We need at least one other person” with whom they can share their
story. These can lead to glimpses of redemption.
Abuse is not confined to a single event in the past, he said, noting
that the impact is real. But he said he is not “crushed” by the past.
He said his wife – “by the grace of God” – has chosen to stay with
him. Others, including his children and priests he knows, stand with him
when he could not stand alone.
He added that he is discerning a call to the permanent diaconate so
that he can be part of the healing for others. “The church heals when it
listens,” he said, noting that he wants to be available for people, as
he had wanted someone to listen to him.
What was done to him is not the end of the story. “What happened
cannot be undone. That betrayal is real and long-lasting,” he said, but
it does not mean there cannot be forgiveness.
After the hearing adjourned, Archbishop Lori spoke to reporters
gathered outside the courthouse and called the stories he heard that day
“soul-searing.”
“I’ve apologized many times, but I realize there is no apology that
can ever cover what has happened to these individuals, and I certainly
admire their courage for being willing to do this,” the archbishop said.
“I cannot imagine – I do not pretend to imagine – how difficult this
must be for the people who have survived abuse, to speak about such
things in their lives.”
He said he recognized as he listened to the witnesses that the church
must be accountable. “Of course, the church must continue to pursue
everything that can possibly do to ensure that this does not happen
again. We have striven to do this over many decades, but I also
recognize if this has happened to you, even those efforts are probably
not going to seem to be enough,” Archbishop Lori said.
He noted that in addition to those involved in the archdiocese’s
case, many others have been abused in other places, including state
institutions and other public or private schools.
“There’s a lot of pain out there. And I think that it’s important that it be heard as well,” he said.
The archbishop said he is anxious and hopeful for a settlement in the
case in the near future that would provide fair, just, equitable
compensation, and at the same time continue the church’s mission in
parishes, schools and charities.
“I think it is very important in the lives of those who have been
harmed, that there be some closure. There’s never full closure, but some
sort of assistance,” he said. “From the very beginning, we have said
that we will put the resources of the church toward a settlement.
And
we have already made a proposal to do that to provide a considerable
amount of money in order to do that. And it is our desire to bring this
to closure as soon as we can.”
He said the archdiocese has done and is doing everything possible to ensure that that abuse is not continuing in the church.
Paul Jan Zdunek, who chairs the Official Committee of Unsecured
Creditors – a group of seven people who represent all the
victim-survivors in the case – told the Catholic Review after the
hearing that he did not make planned opening and closing remarks due to
the judge’s request to allow time for the victims to speak.
“A lot of the things that were in my speech were in the remarks that
came from survivors,” he said, including that the Chapter 11 process
seems to be taking a lot of time and that victim-survivors should be
more than a line item.
“Patience and perseverance are important in this. This has ruined
lives. It’s a moment in time that has a long tailwind that again, as
today, is just not going away for a lot of people. It’s really
heartbreaking,” Zdunek said.
He said the committee and attorneys reached out to various
victim-survivors and their legal counsel to see who would be willing to
share their stories. “It’s very difficult thing to do,” he said, noting
that for some, today – as in past sessions – was the first time speaking
out in the public and to their loved ones about the abuse they
experienced, “which I can’t even imagine.”
Zdunek, a victim of abuse himself, said although the court process
cannot hear all the survivors who want to share their stories, “I think
they do represent, just like we on the committee represent, the rest of
their voices,” he said.