YOU MAY HAVE seen the letters in this newspaper during the week highlighting the confusion concerning Catholic funerals in Ireland.
One, last Saturday, was headed "Two different send-offs". In the letter, Laurence Lacey complained that when his father died last year the family had hoped to use some of his favourite music during the funeral Mass as well as a short tribute from his eldest brother.
He wrote: "We encountered a young(ish) priest who, while extremely polite and sympathetic, absolutely refused to permit any 'secular' elements in the Mass, quoting liturgical correctness as the main reason. While deeply unhappy, we had no option but to acquiesce."
He was "enraged therefore to see that Ronnie Drew had a 'send-off' like no other, complete with a congregational rendering of Weela Weela Wallia, and all presided over by an auxiliary bishop of Dublin. Perhaps celebrity ensures an appropriately robed bishop as chorus master." It should be "either permitted or not to have 'secular elements' and one's status should have no bearing on the matter", he wrote, adding that "this is another example of the hypocrisy which is turning many from holy mother church".
Taking up the theme on Wednesday last, Margaret Lee, from near Newport in Co Tipperary, under the heading "Favouritism and funerals", wrote that " . . . when it comes to planning funeral services, some bereaved people are more equal than others. It would be better if the famous and the not-so-famous were given similar flexibility when arranging liturgies."
Church guidelines are interpreted differently from parish to parish as well as from diocese to diocese - and without consistency. Even the famous are not always guaranteed flexibility when it comes to funeral liturgies, as jazz musician Paddy Cole discovered last July when he was not allowed to play music at his mother's funeral Mass in Castleblayney, Co Monaghan. Just days before, a leaflet had been circulated by Bishop Joseph Duffy setting out rules for funeral Masses in his diocese of Clogher.
It said that specially composed poems and favourite songs at funeral Masses were in breach of diocesan regulations. Further, the practice of mourners lining up to shake hands with bereaved families in church after Requiem Mass was banned, although still permitted during the removal ceremony.
Paddy Cole criticised the ban on him playing at his mother's funeral, not least as he had already played at other funerals all over the State. Other bereaved people rang RTÉ's Liveline to air their anger at being banned from playing "goodbye songs" or giving funeral eulogies. But the clergy in Castleblayney were not for turning. In a statement, they said they had done "nothing more than to give help and guidance to the members of the Christian community . . . It is not about rules and regulations, as some people have said, but rather about helping people come to an understanding of Christian death and to understand that when we celebrate a funeral Mass, we do so in the context of the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. What we are doing here is in line with the diocesan guidelines and best liturgical practice. We are simply reiterating what is already the ideal in terms of funeral liturgies and to emphasise again that a funeral is a sacred occasion." That was on July 16th.
ON JULY 30TH in the neighbouring diocese of Ardagh and Clonmacnoise Bishop Colm O'Reilly was reported as saying, in response to the controversy, that "rules are sometimes dangerous things". If a bereaved person "wished to play a more popular song, such as the departed person's favourite tune, they can do so after the priest has completed the ceremony of Mass," he said.
He also said that in some parts of the country - but not in his own diocese - eulogies have been removed from funerals.
"Like the personal songs, we request that the bereaved wait until after the Mass ceremony is over and then they can speak of their loved one in the church." He had no objection to mourners shaking hands with the family of the deceased within the church. "I think it's more practical for people to shake hands with the bereaved in the church than in the car park, as it would only make it more difficult to bring the coffin to the hearse," he remarked.
What you have here is wholesale confusion and maybe that is as well, because it is clear that, while some church authorities might want funerals to be conducted in one way, many of the faithful do not feel the same. Attempts by some bishops to sort this out their way continue to be ignored.
BACK IN MARCH 2000 the Catholic primate Cardinal Seán Brady issued a letter to his priests on the matter. He said the practice of including eulogies in Catholic funerals was to be strongly discouraged. "Requests by members of the family to speak after the prayer after Communion should be firmly but sensitively refused," he said.
He noted that, according to the Order of Christian Funerals, the church's manual for conducting the funeral rite, "a brief homily based on the readings should always be given at the funeral liturgy, but never any kind of eulogy".
He said that including a eulogy could "lead to unnecessary duplication of the sentiments expressed in the homily and in the Prayers of the Faithful" and that "it can cause unnecessarily severe emotional stress to expect a member of the family to address the congregation immediately before the final commendation and farewell . . . Such a practice distracts, sometimes seriously, from the sacred nature of the liturgy and occasionally may be offensive to the congregation."
He suggested "other opportunities are available to acknowledge the life of the deceased, for example at the graveside, at the meal afterwards or in columns of the local newspapers".
A spokesman for the then archbishop said at the time that the practice of including eulogies was a "growing trend", and one that, in recent times, had "crept in; it has no place in the liturgy". He also emphasised that Dr Brady was not the first Irish bishop to make such an instruction, as two other bishops had recently done so.
"There is no intention other than that the family be fully involved in the funeral" in such ways as choosing readings and bidding prayers, he said. A church source stressed at the time that it would still be up to each individual bishop to decide what was appropriate in his diocese.
In April 2004, Bishop Bill Murphy of Kerry diocese also addressed the issue. He said "the sacredness of the funeral Mass is compromised by things that would be more appropriate outside the funeral liturgy such as secular songs and music, eulogies and inappropriate items in the offertory procession".
But many times in the past year alone - at the funerals of Joe Dolan, Michael Mills, Nuala O'Faolain, Terry Keane, Barry Twomey, Seamus Brennan, and of course Ronnie Drew, to name but a few - eulogies were given by family and friends, highlighting the inconsistency in the implementation of church guidelines.
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(Source: Irish Times)