IT'S no secret that people all over the world are leaving organised religion.To ask why people are leaving the Catholic Church is seen to be disloyal and will result in reprimand from on high.
However, Bishop O'Connell of Trenton, New Jersey, took a more positive approach and hired a professional group to dialogue with Catholics who have made a conscious decision to stay away from weekly Eucharist.
In all they interviewed 300 absentees over an extended period and the survey revealed some enlightening trends. It was compiled by William J Byron, a Jesuit priest.
The researchers discovered that an overwhelming number of the respondents left both their parish and their church. About a quarter said they had separated themselves from the parish but still considered themselves to be Catholics.
"I separated my family from the Catholic Church and turned to an alternative religion for a while and then returned knowing that I had the right religion but the wrong people running it," one woman wrote. Relatively few drifted away. The vast majority had sincerely tried to make their membership to the Church be a good spiritual experience, but many gave up in frustration.
A 23-year-old woman wrote, "I felt deceived and undervalued by the church. I didn't understand certain things and found no mentors within the church. I stopped going because my community of friends and family were no longer in the church."
And another added with great clarity, "I tried different Catholic churches in the area because I just didn't seem to be getting anything out of Mass, especially the homily."
That was a common theme also well expressed by this respondent.
"I stopped going regularly because the homilies were so empty and whenever the church wanted to raise funds, they dropped the homily and talked money."
There were multiple complaints about the quality of homilies and lifeless liturgies.
As you would expect the scandals surrounding the sexual abuse of minors by clergy was frequently mentioned. Equally damaging was the way the crisis was handled by the leadership in the church because it led to a lack of trust.
The interviewers were asked, "Are there any changes your parish might make that would prompt you to return?"
The researchers found no discernible trend in the replies but people are willing to enter dialogue if they are convinced they will be taken seriously.
Here are some of the issues they want to discuss: "Be accepting of divorced and remarried congregants."
Loving
"I am looking for more spiritual guidance and longer sermon.""Make homilies more relevant; give us an outwardly loving, kind Christian priest."
As part of the discussion, the people were also asked, "Are there any religious beliefs / practices specific to the Catholic church that troubled you?" Here is a sampling of what people replied.
"Yes the church's views on gays, same sex marriage, women as priests and priests not marrying."
"History of discrimination against women, unwelcoming attitude."
"Bishops covering up child abuse and transferring offending priests to other parishes."
"End the clericalism and people like me may listen to the church again."
"If the Catholic Church does not change its archaic views about women, it is going to become a religion that survives on the fringe of an openminded society."
All of the above were seen as helpful by the Bishop of Trenton, N.J his staff and researchers.
Fr Byron concluded that there was much to be learned from the survey. The obligation to attend Sunday Mass needs further explaining. The quality of preaching in churches needs attention as does the image of clergy who - fairly or unfairly - are often seen as distant, unavailable and uncaring.
There were many other issues raised which were helpful. You will find them on the website of the Diocese of Trenton, New Jersey.
The best sign of hope for me was that people were willing to share their opinions in such a positive way.