A Catholic bishop has warned priests against neglecting sacramental duties after a family left the Church when a request for last rites for a dying relative went unanswered.
Bishop Agustinus Tri Budi Utomo of Surabaya raised the case during the Chrism Mass and renewal of priestly promises on March 31 at the Sacred Heart Cathedral, calling it a serious failure in ministry and urging clergy to respond promptly to urgent pastoral needs.
Three weeks before the Mass, the bishop said he received a WhatsApp message from a Catholic family known to him, informing him of their decision to formally leave the Church.
The family said their request for the Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick had been ignored, and their relative later died without receiving it.
“This is a profound experience of faith, especially in the administration of the Sacrament of the Anointing of the Sick. Please, never delay or refuse requests from the faithful to receive this sacrament,” he said.
He warned that denying such requests cuts to the core of priestly ministry.
“Such refusal may be one of the gravest sins for us priests — daring to refuse sacramental service to the faithful. We must never dare to ‘punish’ the faithful by withholding the sacraments,” he said, stressing that “our first and foremost duty is to be ministers of the sacraments.”
Using the incident as a point of reflection, the bishop called on priests to return to the foundations of their vocation.
“In every work and action, we must imagine that the Lord Jesus is always present with us priests. God uses our hands, eyes, and mouths to touch the hearts of the faithful we serve,” he said.
He urged unity among clergy, saying priests should see one another “not as competitors or as sources of irritation, but with spiritual eyes,” recognizing that each is sent “to make Christ present, with all their weaknesses.”
The bishop also stressed the importance of presence in the Eucharist, even when not assigned to preside.
“Even when not assigned, we are present — either as concelebrants in the sanctuary or simply seated among the faithful in clerical attire,” he said, adding that “this presence has its own spiritual richness.”
He also pointed to the responsibility of priests to teach and accompany the faithful, particularly those preparing to enter the Church.
Catechumens, he said, are “special guests” who must be welcomed “with our most gracious faces and most open hearts into the Body of Christ.”
At the same time, he cautioned priests about their language in preaching. “Teaching the love of God is the most essential lesson,” he said, urging clergy to avoid words or actions that may lead to “verbal or psychological violence, humiliation, or hate speech toward anyone.”
The bishop also warned against attachment to comfort and material benefits, saying these can weaken commitment to service.
“Lifestyle is a witness of faith. Choosing simplicity means standing in solidarity with God’s people — the sick, the poor, the oppressed, and the imprisoned,” he said, adding that comfort can tempt priests “to neglect service.”
Addressing lay Catholics, the bishop acknowledged the fragility of priests but urged the faithful to respond with prayer and dialogue rather than public condemnation.
“Dear faithful, priests are fragile and full of weaknesses. Correcting them is not done by condemning or exposing them publicly. Pray for them, meet them personally,” he said. “What you do is seen by God, and that is enough.”
He also called for prayers for vocations and for Church workers, adding: “Pray also for me, your bishop, who is weak and sinful, that I may shepherd all the faithful according to the example of Jesus, the Good Shepherd.”
The bishop said the incident should lead to deeper reflection on pastoral responsibility, especially in responding to urgent sacramental needs.
“Through the Anointing of the Sick, the ill experience God’s mercy directly. It is a deeply existential experience of faith for the salvation of souls,” he said.