When Bill Appleton was in high school in New Jersey there were two things he knew for sure he wanted: be a Roman Catholic priest and find a woman he could love.A clear and obvious conflict if there ever was one.
He realized the two could not coexist, and years later, would pray to God for “the gift of celibacy.”
“It took a steep toll on me emotionally,” he said.
People like Mr. Appleton have always been around, lobbying in small corners of the Catholic Church to open the priesthood to married men. Their cause has gained fuel in recent years as the number of priests declines to the point of crisis. Now the debate has moved from the margins and closer to the middle.
Last week, a prominent Jesuit magazine, America, said it was time to consider allowing married men to enter the priesthood.
Earlier this year, the outgoing archbishop of New York surprised everyone when he said the Church would soon have to at least consider allowing married men into the priesthood.
“I think it’s going to be discussed; it’s a perfectly legitimate discussion,” Edward Cardinal Egan said in response to a question about the serious shortage of priests. “I think it has to be looked at.”
In the United States, where there are 41,000 active priests, it is estimated that 16,000 priests have left the ministry to marry, representing a potential pool of men to fill the gap in areas where the shortage of priests is chronic. No similar statistics could be found for Canada.
Sister Chris Schenk, of FutureChurch, a U.S. group that advocates liberalizing church rules on celibacy, said she was deeply encouraged by the remarks of Cardinal Egan and the America editorial.
“I’m a nun. I believe in the celibate spiritual path. It has been a very good one for me. But God calls all kinds of people in all different ways,” she said.
“We have married people [in society] serving in many demanding professions — brain surgeons, Supreme Court justices — and they seem to manage. They will tell you their family life sustains their work and gives them emotional support. I see a lot of pluses because many priests are quite lonely.”
There were married priests in the early Church, but they were forbidden to have conjugal relations with their wives. The notion of a celibate priesthood began to evolve through the first millennium. In the 12th century, it came officially into force.
Anne Moore, who teaches about the early Church at the University of Calgary, said there was actually a worldly reason for promoting celibacy: to prevent religious family dynasties. A celibate priesthood could not pass clerical positions from father to son, she said, and it also ensured that property and wealth was maintained by the Church.
The idea of married priests today is not completely foreign. Hundreds of disaffected married Anglican and Lutheran ministers have become Roman Catholic priests. In the some of the Eastern Rite Catholic churches, married men can become priests.
Father Paul Sullins, who teaches sociology at The Catholic University of America, in Washington D.C., doesn’t believe that celibacy is suddenly a deal-breaker for men thinking of the priesthood.
“The rule of celibacy has been in effect for 1,000 years. So why would relaxing the rule now increase vocations? If it hadn’t kept men away before, why would it keep men away now?”
The only views that have changed, he said, are those of Catholic scholars.
But Father Donald Cozzens, who teaches at a Jesuit school, said he meets men all the time who would be wonderful priests if not for the celibacy rule.
“I’ve met men who are very committed to their faith and social justice and I’ve asked, ‘Have you ever thought of becoming a priest?’ Every one of them has said they would love to be a priest, but would also like to have a family. The argument that mandatory celibacy is not a factor in the vocation crisis I don’t think holds water.”
Mr. Appleton, 32, who lives in Cleveland, Ohio, desperately wanted to be a priest and believed he could change his nature. “God would give me the strength to overcome my concerns,” he thought.
After a year of study, a priest asked him, “When are you at your best?”
“It was the question that stuck out for me. I’m at my best when I’m in a relationship. And I was about to make a decision that wouldn’t let me be at my best. Why would God ask me to do that?
“The call to celibacy and call to priesthood are not synonymous.”
Savio Russo had been a priest in Cincinnati, Ohio, for 14 years when he met a woman and fell in love. Nearly 30 years later, with a wife and three daughters, he said he would have continued his vocation if not for the celibacy rule.
“It was very exciting work, but it was like a two-edged sword: you’re intimate in all these people’s lives, but in your own life there’s not much intimacy. And I don’t just mean sexually.”
He does not accept the argument that a married priest would be distracted from his parishioners.
“In this culture, people do not run to the priest as much as they did in the past,” he said. “I feel that if priests were married, they would better be able to speak to the problems of their parishioners. Now there’s an unreality to their lives.”
Catholics pushing for a married priesthood say the consequences of not opening the door to married men will be a much weakened Church.
In the United States, there has been a 30% drop in the number of Catholic clergy since 1965.
Where there was one priest for every 760 Catholics, there is now one for every 1,500.
The number of graduate-level seminarians has also fallen 44%. It is estimated that half of all parishes no longer have their own full-time priest.
In Canada, the numbers are also stark. Since 2000, the number of priests is down 25% to 7,600 priests in 2008.
Rev. Cozzens, who is also the author of a book called Freeing Celibacy, said it is a difficult but necessary step to break the tradition of a chaste life for priests. “What makes the priesthood strong is having healthy priests — physically, emotionally, psychologically and spiritually. That’s the more fundamental question for me.”
However, he acknowledged that having married priests would bring a new set of problems — infidelity, divorce and spousal abuse; “All the things that go with marriage,” he said.
Those who support celibacy say there are myriad other reasons why vocations are down, ranging from a societal shift in attitudes to smaller family size.
“Vocations are down because of the same reason there is a crisis in marriage: lack of commitment, a lack of selflessness,” said Fr. John Horgan, a parish priest in Vancouver and a scholar. “A priest is not just an ordained bachelor. A married man’s first vocation is to his family. That creates a conflict.”
Fr. Sullins is a former Anglican priest who converted to Catholicism, but he understands more than most that conflict: He wears the priest’s collar and is also a family man. He thinks an influx of married priests would diminish the calling.
“Married priests like myself are torn in two directions. We’re not able to be available and present all the time. When people call us Father, it doesn’t sit as well with men who are fathers of another kind.”
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