The body of John Pirona, 45, was discovered by police in a car at Tomago near Newcastle in the early hours of this morning, nearly a week after his wife Tracey last saw him on Saturday night.
Ms Pirona said she alerted police to his disappearance after finding a letter that spoke of the pain he felt being linked to a pedophile priest and of his wish "to go nobly".
"The pain was just too much for him," Ms Pirona told AAP today. "He felt like his children were better off without him."
The former NSW Fire Brigades officer was sexually assaulted by the Hunter priest when he was 11 years old, Ms Pirona said.
She said the priest, who can't be named for legal reasons, is currently in prison.
Mr Pirona did not tell his wife or other family members of the abuse until 2008.
She said the abuse had led her husband to intermittent struggles with alcohol and drugs throughout his life.
The couple, who were married for 18 years and have two children aged seven and 11, had recently been living apart in a bid to repair their marriage.
"Our relationship has suffered so many times over the years and I never knew why."
Ms Pirona said she was determined to have those who protected the pedophile priest held to account and renewed calls for a royal commission into the Catholic church's handling of sexual abuse.
"It affected every part of his life, his soul and his being. Now my children have no father," she said. "How many more people have to go through what we have gone through before they hold a royal commission?"
The Catholic Archbishop of Sydney George Pell said he was shocked and saddened by Mr Pirona's death and offered his deepest sympathies to his family and friends.
Cardinal Pell said he acknowledged past failures, but did not support calls for a Royal Commission.
"But if there was one the Catholic Church authorities would co-operate fully," he said in a statement.