Monday, January 09, 2012

Surge in calls to counsellors to help salvage marriages

MARRIAGE counsellors have been inundated with calls from warring couples who are desperate to salvage their relationships after a fraught Christmas.

According to relationship experts, the post-Christmas period is one of the busiest times of year for therapists as couples in already strained marriages are more vulnerable to break-ups.

Demand for counselling sessions at Dublin’s AIM Family Services has never been as high in its 30-year history.

The voluntary agency said yesterday it had dealt with 60% more clients between November last year and the first week of January in comparison to the previous year.

The organisation has just seven slots available in the final week of January, while many clients are banking on cancellations to secure urgently-needed sessions over the next couple of weeks.

Michelle Clarke, AIM spokeswoman, said: "We opened back up on January 3, but we’ve been completely booked up in both the pre and post-Christmas period.
"Financial difficulties have made it particularly difficult for a lot of families this year and if there’s been a loss or bereavement in the family, that makes things all the worse. There’s a bigger demand on services at this time because the Christmas period magnifies any existing issues tenfold."

Relationships Ireland also said the number of couples who had made contact was higher than usual for this time of year.

Lisa O’Hara, a counsellor with the charity, said: "We only opened up a couple of days ago, but the phones have been busier than ever. What’s unusual about it is that couples usually wait until the kids are back at school before they contact us.

"What I’ve noticed this time is that a lot more men, mainly in their 40s or 50s, have been picking up the phone, which is highly unusual.

"In some cases, they’ve been forced to make the call to show their commitment to the relationship and they might say they have to go to therapy immediately, because their wife is threatening to leave. Others are doing it without any prompting from their partners.

"But it shows counselling doesn’t have the same stigma it used to for men. That’s a trend I’ve noticed over the past two years.

"Now between 30% and 40% of the clients I’m seeing are through appointments made by men, whereas five to six years ago that figure was between 10% and 20%."