The number of marriages is decreasing in Italy, by about 15 percent each
year, and the age at which people get married is going up (over 30). First marriages and those between spouses who both have Italian citizenship are becoming fewer. There is, in fact, an increase of marriages where one spouse is foreign.
This data provided by the Research Institute of National Statistics (Istat) is corroborated by the investigations that the Diocesan family agents have conducted in the local churches, in a pastoral perspective.
We note here
the research on how the engaged couples and pre-marriage courses are
changing. This study, directed by Alfonso Colzani and Francesca Dossi,
Directors the family ministry in the Archdiocese of Milan, was published
in L'Osservatore Romano on July 2nd.
In the capital of Lombardy, the average age of the “couples
who pronounce the fateful ‘yes’” is higher by about three years (more
than 36 for men, over 34 for women). Like in the rest of Italy, the
number of religious marriages has decreased, by about 24%, to the point
that, in 2011, the majority of weddings were civil marriages. In the
diocese of Milan, in the decade 2001-2011, marriages in the Church have
reduced to one fourth, from more than 23 thousand to less than 7
thousand.
If, on the one hand, the process of
secularization has led to a reduction of religious marriages and of
marriages in general, on the other hand, the preparatory courses
indicate—say the agents—a qualitative improvement. “Few, but good.” “We
are well aware that those who ask for a Christian marriage today are
more motivated, and do so because they have sensed in this choice an
advantage for themselves and for their family; they are conscious that
the religious sphere has a particular value that assures depth and roots
for the future. Then, there is the most surprising phenomenon of recent
years, namely, the explosion of the practice of premarital
cohabitation, widespread even among those seeking Christian marriage.” This
reveals “a radical change of mentality, given that even a large number
of believers no longer approaches marriage in the form of the fides, but
as a test.” They want to try, before making a decision. “A trial period proves to be reassuring.”
According
to Istat, in large urban areas about 95 per cent of the couples live
together before getting married, and in small towns these couples
represent between 60 and 75 percent. The higher number is due to the
transformation of the mentality, marked by precariousness and
uncertainty. Moreover, it is noted that “the decision to live
together is also conditioned by job insecurity, which discourages people
from taking on binding responsibilities.”
Work, its absence or precariousness, constitutes the main reason for over 30 percent of the cases.
Often, the decision to marry follows the birth of a child: “becoming parents is an important step that seems to mark a change in the perception of the couple’s relationship, which, after the birth of a child is felt to be more important and therefore requires a further step.”